3:00 am crisis

I don't really know about other people but I feel that  change happen sometimes when people are forced to! 

 I am one of those people, I became ill and was facing possible death. It is a very sobering situation, and it provided the enthuisiasm  for me to change. 

I have been trying to change alot of things that of late.

I was going to list all things that I am trying to change but instead how about how I have been making changes. 

It starts at the margins (heard that somewhere) which I think is true and which alot of people I think seem to miss. I think people try to do change through the "cold turkey method" and struggle with it and often fail. Which then leads to feeling shitty because you have failed with yourself ( Shame happens to be the strongest emotion out there but that is another topic).

Let's take weight lose as a case in point. I think that it starts at the margins. I trying to make little changes and try for little goals. Like trying to eat more fruit, I still love junk food but now I try to have fruit every where so that when I am hungry I turn around and bump into a peice of fruit. I still get a hankering for candy and what not and I still eat it but I try to eat it after I have had a couple of pieces of fruit first. The same goes with thirst, I try to have a few bottles of water in my ca and in my backpack at all times. It is the same thing I drink the water first and then did a pop. 

 Which is brings me to another way that I have managed to change my diet. This might ound stupid but it worked for me. 

I was a very heavy Coke drinker when I was younger and drank it by the litre. I decided that it was crazy and had a hard time stopping. I managed to stop this habit by.... I will have to finish this thought later....it is 4 am and i seem to be able to sleep now I will try to explain the sickness change as well.