Critical Mass Virgin
I picked my bike up from my kind predeccesor and continued home with a huge grin on my face and squinting slightly because of the glare from the gorgeous chrome handlebar, with difficulty I boarded it onto the front of a bus (its a long darn bike so only the front wheel is properly in) and nervously watched it sway as we braked down the hill.
I took it for a nice trip down past kits beach with my sister and on the return journey had a Near Dog Experience where an unsuspecting canine ran out between two cars and both of us back-peddled to saftey. However it was enough to unnerve me and had me on high alert for the remainder of the trip.
The REAL fun began when I joined the Critical Mass on Friday - for those of you that dont know it is a bike ride on the last friday of every month to promote cycling and about 1000 people take over the street, its great fun.
Anyway, so we join them just as they set off and you are absorbed into this brilliant atmosphere, people have strapped radios to their bikes, bubble machines, flags, dogs, you name it and you'll probably see it. Many are dressed up for whatever reaason, one guy erm, dressed 'differently' by going naked - and as I was cruising along enjoying the scene he came up on my right, I looked aross, then down, quickly away - swerved and recovered in time to see his naked bum go off into the crowd. Brilliant.
However although this bike can take you pretty much anywhere, hills are not the favourable option. The lack of any gears renders you pretty useless in the face of an incline and although I was impressed at how I managed with the few climbs, after about five minutes it felt like treading lead while someone had poured acid through my viens, it was at this point someone plucked up the courage to ask me about my bike;
Me: *Pant*
Interested biker: Hey, can I ask you about your bike?
Me: *Pant* Sure! *Pant* It's from the site 'Changeeverything' *Pant*
Interested biker: Oh cool, how long do you have it for?
Me: *pant* I doesnt have gears, this is hard work *pant* Hang on...*pant*
So while I try to save up enough breath for my next explanation, someone grabs my back and begins pushing me up hill! I turn and a kind guy smiles and says;
Kindguy: I had one of those and I know what it's like!
Wow, so this amazing guy pushes me for the next 20 meters or so, Im unsure as to what the 'being pushed' etiquette is so I peddle harder and after one final push he rushes off into the distance...
I spot another Vancitybikeshare so I wheel my way through and we have a discussion about the lack of gears, the beauty of the bike and we tell each other what we named our bikes, his was Gerrade, mine was The Scarlett Pimpernelle - well thats its show name anyway.
On I travel with the 1000 bikers, we get beeped and sworn at by cars we block I sing out "Buy a pushbike!" with a smile to the already enraged motorists. Cries of "We dont stop traffic; we ARE traffic!" emerge from the crowd. We stop in various places to regroup and wave bikes over our head and generally have a ball. I saw bus drivers steering slowly with their knees and taking pictures with their free hands and pedestrians risking serious injury to try and cross our path. However many just stand and cheer, we had one starbucks worker run out and yell "what are you cycling FOR?!" To which many replied; "For BIKES!".
However the best thing about being on my bike was that I had many people come up and ask me about it, and the people around me would listen in - it was great, spreading the word and getting to chat to so many people. After we left we were all on a Critical Mass high and had to remember we didnt own the road any more and to cease our excessive bell ringing.
Although along the way The Pimp got a few admiring looks, there were many other wonderful bikes - I supposed you'll have to see for yourself at the next Critical Mass..."We dont stop traffic..."
